Naked at the Gym?

Being naked at the gym is a debate men have been having for the past 100 years.  Should you do it?  Should you not do it?  If you’re doing it, what’s protocol?

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Well I’m here to layout a few of my basic understandings of Naked Gym Etiquette:

If you’re naked in the gym: Don’t engage in long conversation with men who are not naked.  It’s one thing to be in a full on conversation with another gent flapping his stuff around, but it is a whole other ball game to continue on in conversation with a guy who is clothed, or even wearing a towel.

If you’re naked: Only shave your face in the shower.  I myself shave after I shower, so this won’t ever be an issue.  But, these days, grooming is an important thing for some men to do.  Trust me, no one wants to see you shaving your chest or anything else in the shower.  Keep it above the neck.

If you’re naked: Keep your space.  No one wants to have a face to face conversation in the locker room.  No one.  Whether the other person is naked or clothed, keep your distance when you are talking to someone else in the vicinity.  Things could get “different” if you don’t.

If your gym doesn’t have a pool: Don’t shower there if you can’t tough it out and get naked.  Some gyms have personal showers, so if you can find one there and feel more comfortable, go for it.  But, if there is no private shower, and your gym does not have a pool, do not be the guy who specifically packed a bathing suit to shower up.  You’ll forever be the weird guy at the gym.  You will be judged a lot less if you just decide to shower at home.

If you’re not naked: Don’t stare at the guys that are.  No explanations.

If you’re not naked: Don’t make it weird for those who are.  Don’t talk about it to those who are also not naked.  For years, it has been a man thing or a locker room thing to nude up with a bunch of other dudes. Let them have it if they want it.

There you have it, some naked dude etiquette for the wise.  So next time you’re at the gym, remember, it’s not weird if you’re naked, but there are ways to make it weird.  Avoid them.

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